I have a present for you. 63. At least you can hide it under bangs or a hat. 75. The next time they annoy you, say these witty words. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Please keep in mind that the best comebacks for when someone says you have no friends are influenced and determined by the status of the person who is saying that to you. What did you want to be when you grew up? I dont have the time or the crayons to explain this to you. If you ever cross my mind, Ill make sure its a busy intersection. 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So, you will see in this article a wide range of phrases that you can keep in your back pocket to serve as a snappy comeback to when someone says to you 'did I ask?" . i have been getting made fun of my big forehead and it hurts a LOT a school i try to ignore it but i can't help me, please apply cold water to the burns imma use dat one, Yeah my forehead is as big as your stupidity. 3. 13. Then forget the "your mom" and "your face" rants and follow these steps: ask them is that all you got? Youre the reason the divorce rate is so high. If you love this resource, don't miss our amazing resource Verbal Self Defense Made Easy bundle that will teach you how to effortlessly shut down rude people in record time. 2. 68. May both sides of your pillow be uncomfortably warm. 6. This is a witty comeback you can give to someone who says to you that you have no friends and expects you to feel like you are missing out. Isnt there a bullet somewhere you could be jumping in front of? You just have bad luck when youre thinking. Are you normally this obnoxious, or is there some class you took? I think theyre onto something. Itll also make you look hilarious to anyone who overhears. At least I have an excuse, your just an a*shole. What this will be interpreted as is that you have seen the advice from the remark they made, but that advice is to do away with them.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'callforte_com-leader-1','ezslot_0',121,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-leader-1-0'); Nobody is perfect. 10. Guy: Havent I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yeah, thats why I dont go there anymore. "You're stuck up" "Jealousy is a disease. But if you get yourself familiar with some classic comeback statements, youd be able to flaunt confidence whenever such hurtful words are said to you. Chances are they wont have anything to say because theyd want to agree to disagree. I think you've confused me with someone who cares. These clean comebacks will definitely shut up any bully or jerk. Dont end there. The person will get confused when you give a response that indicates that you couldnt care less about what they think of you. Id slap you but I dont want to make your face look any better. As a small thank you, wed like to offer you a $30 gift card (valid at GoNift.com). We guarantee at least one of these snarky comebacks will wipe the smirk off your enemys face. 1. This is a lose-lose situation for me. I found a spot for you. I didnt think it was possible to give me more reasons to hate you until today. Oops! I wrote something nice for you in invisible ink. Best Knock-Knock Jokes. You are so dumb, you stand on a chair to raise your IQ. You are so old, even your memory is in black and white. You are very smart. Im surprised your teeth arent brown from all the shit talking you do. Swallow your pride and your tongue while youre at it. Guy: Can I buy you a drink?Girl: Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too! 55. I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral. 71. You shouldnt waste your time on people who do not have good intentions towards you just because you want to prove you can make friends with people. They say our brains dont stop developing until we reach 25; looks like yours stopped a bit early. 82. They often hide behind the shield of their unwavering "honesty," but be careful not to confuse honesty with unpleasant, baseless . 98. It puts them in a tough position to respond to your comeback. You are proof that evolution can go in reverse. The list below has a comeback for practically every situation you could possibly run into from the jerk boyfriend and the fake friend to the helicopter parent and the nosy neighbor. Were you born this stupid or did you take lessons? Jesus might love you, but everyone else definitely thinks youre an idiot. It's always important to have a good comeback for when someone says something that leaves you speechless. In your case, one would have been better than none. Lets start with your bank account. 2010 The Thought & Expression Company, LLC. Keep rolling your eyes, you might eventually find a brain. Theyre running out of you. 59. RELATED:111 Ways To Say "F*ck You" While Keeping It Classy. It is a 5head.". I think you should go and apologize to it. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform. 99. You fear success, but you really have nothing to worry about. You are like a cloud. 2. 5. Look no further, because here are some good comebacks to use: The best comebacks make you look mature. Ditch the outfit. Everyone makes mistakes. Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all stupid people. Good job. Id slap you but I dont want to make your face look any better. You need to be able to quickly gather your thoughts and say something witty in return. On the contrary, you are focused on building quality friendships. 3. However, we normally feel some form of relief when we cry. Youve got something on your face. Guy: Does beauty run in your family?Girl: It obviously doesnt in yours! Large and in charge isn't your excuse to be a fat asshole. By signing up you are agreeing to receive emails according to our privacy policy. 5. Your only purpose inlifeis to become an organ donor. 23. If you ever encounter a bully or anyone who says something mean to you for no good reason, snap right back at them! Thank you, were all challenged by your unique point of view. There are several people in this world that I find obnoxious and you are all of them. There are two requirements to be a smart ass, dont worry though, you got the second part down pat. There is no vaccine against stupidity. There was something about you that I liked, but you spent it. They say opposites attract. I will have to lie to myself about liking you if you insist in accepting you as you are. Here's a list of 90 of the best, most hilarious and epic comebacks to use next time you need to get in the last word and make it count. If genius skips a generation, your children will be brilliant. Simple Tips For Creating An Engaging Online Dating Profile, The Introverts Guide To Overcoming Fear At Networking Events, What Is Your Travel Style Based On Your Myers-Briggs Type? Savage Comebacks You should come with a warning label. You are ignoring the person and you dont care about their opinion of you!if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[336,280],'callforte_com-leader-4','ezslot_14',125,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-leader-4-0'); This response applies to pretty much most remarks. Are you almost done with all of this drama? By giving this reply, it means that you are in control and intentional about the kind of people you make as friends. Friend: Yeah, let's keep it that way You're as sharp as a rubber ball. If you want to be a smartass, you have to be smart. Want more humor? If Moses had seen your face, there would have been another commandment. If we were to kill everybody who hates you, it wouldnt be murder; it would be genocide! If you ever had a bright idea, it would be beginners luck! If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents. If your brain was chocolate it wouldnt fill an M&M. Is your name Dan Druff? You have your entire life to be a jerk. I was just imagining the day of your birth in my head. It just smells much better than you. It's a game changerget it free for a limited time! Did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours? Otherwise, youre just an ass. Youre a pain in the neck. Lets play house. 86. 16. I offended you with my opinion? In fact in your case theyre nothing. Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people. Dont you have a terribly empty feeling in your skull? Dont you need a license to be that ugly? They say you're dumb? Thats why you should mind your own business and shut the f*ck up, 25. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. 30 Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Cry Baby by Admin We know that when one is called a crybaby; it is because they exhibit traits relatable to babies, which includes crying often. Then why are you all up in my. I dont know what your problem is, but Im guessing its hard to pronounce. Im going to call on someone else. Learn more Do you hate it when people insult you and want to give them a nice, smooth comeback? Guy: Havent I seen you someplace before?Girl: Yes, thats why I dont go there anymore. By using our site, you agree to our. You better pay it extra. Oh, you dont like being treated the way you treat me? Some of the most beautiful women in the world have large foreheads and their doing OK. Look at Rhianna, rocking it as one of the major sining talents, she doesn't let the 5head comments get in her way. Girl: Youre so fat!Guy: Hey, I may be fat, but youll always be ugly, and I can diet! Me: Fleetwood Mac. If your brain was dynamite, there wouldnt be enough to blow your hat off. No I do, you are just not one of them. You should really come with a warning label. Now, he's very intelligent. We all spring from apes, but you didn't spring far enough. I may love to shop, but I will never buy your bull. Youre the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo. My heart was beating fast when I saw you walk in. Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all stupid people. Id have hired an exterminator if I knew you were gonna bug the shit out of me. You are not only telling them that the friends you have are your decision to make, but you are also hammering the message that they are not part of the people youd choose. Best Roasts |Best Dark Jokes That must suck. Our Stand Up for Yourself the Easy Way Guide will show you how to do it in just 3 simple steps. Isnt there a bullet somewhere you could be jumping in front of? Jill Zwarensteyn is a writer and Michigan native who covers trending topics, pop culture and astrology. Guy: I think youre the best looking girl in here.Girl: Really? If you were an inanimate object, youd be a participation trophy. 4. Take my lowest priority and put yourself beneath it. So it is forgivable that they assume wrongly. Louie Armstrong would have never released What a Wonderful World had he met you. 69. 97. 1. Like a comeback if someone calls you fat, make one up, then keep it in your mind. I'm not sure; I've always wondered about it. Id tell you to blow your brains out, but Im pretty certain theres nothing there. You have miles to go before you reach mediocre. 10 times 0 is zero, you have proven my point. Additionally, he loves to write zany fiction stories and take care of his pet frog. I could eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarter statement than whatever you just said. You dont want to match their ridiculousness. Guy: Would you like to dance?Girl: Not with you.Guy: Oh, come on. Someday youll go far. Even if I did, it's better than having both a small brain AND a small dick like you. (Part 1), Online Dating: Icebreaker Questions That Get The Answers. RELATED:30 Perfect Comebacks To Use When Someone Calls You Fat. Hey, your village called they want their idiot back. Only a socially-awkward jackass would make a comment like that. At least I am still better looking than you! Too bad your parents took it literally. No amount of self-editing can fix the massive failure your autobiography would be. And Im leaving early. Make a mental list of comebacks for different subjects. Best Deez Nuts Jokes | Best Yo Mama Jokes Yeah that is now. 77. Who do you think I am? wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Stupidity's not a crime, so feel free to go. You get into peoples hair. Youre about as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle. The best comebacks taste as sweet as revenge when used appropriately, but we know how hard witty comebacks are to come up with when youre put on the spot. Unfortunately, the blueprints are messy, written in Mandarin, and waterlogged beyond all recognition. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. Check out what Tyra has to say. Purposeful and intentional people are respected and feared. 18. Go back to wherever you came from! I never even listen when you tell me them. Lasts longer in bed, too. Having no friends is better than being fake friends with you. Someday youll go far. You just have bad luck when youre thinking. There are various ways you can express how that statement made you feel while making the person feel bad about saying such.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'callforte_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_15',128,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'callforte_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_16',128,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-callforte_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-128{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:15px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:15px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:250px;min-width:250px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. 94. Well, Id better go find the best looking guy then! Absence makes the heart remember, apparently. And if you're reading these funny quotes and hilarious insults, you probably have, too. 82 Chuck Norris Jokes//91 Yo Mama Jokes//154 Bad Jokes//118 Bad Dad Jokes, Best Dad Jokes | Best Pick Up Lines But it strikes even harder when you rub it on the persons face that you are giving them the silent treatment to emphasize this reason. Somewhere out there, theres a tree working very hard to produce oxygen so that you can breathe. Guy: I would go to the end of the world for you.Girl: Yes, but would you stay there? Bullshit that idea and let them know you find no value in building bridges that lead to people like them. Everyones entitled to act stupid once in a while, but you really abuse the privilege. A friend had been pulled over for speeding in Malibu and the cop told him "Go back to Mexico." I'm a Chumash! Your skin is glowing, but I think its from the radiation emanating from your toxic ass personality. I present to you: absolutely fucking nothing. Me neither. I hope your wife brings a date to your funeral. Yeah, you are fluent in lies 5. Comebacks and insults that will destroy your worst enemies If you want to shut someone down when they start to get mean, you need to use one of these perfect comebacks: I was today years old when I realized I didn't like you. I found it in my business. Dont be ashamed of who you are. Ive never had many life goals. I used to think that you were a big pain in the neck. There are some remarkably dumb people in this world. This kid will say stuff and doesn't really know what that means. I thought of you today. 60. We use cookies to make wikiHow great. 89. 50+ Snappy Comebacks for Bullies. I dont have any trash to take out today, but I volunteer you as tribute. I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing alright. So, a thought crossed your mind? The truth will set you free. 22. Were you born this stupid or did you take lessons? 3. Why didnt you choose the dark alleyway? You have your entire life to be a jerk. It takes me a lot of effort to smile when youre around. "Get a life LOL" "Like yours? They blurt out the first thing that comes to their mind, without thinking about the consequences. 30 Best Comebacks When Someone Says You Don't Have Any Friends 1. Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone. They just say you were sixteen years old before you learned how to wave goodbye. 64. Discover short videos related to comebacks if someone says i have a brain on TikTok. Good comeback for "and you have no brains". I wanted to live life without many regrets. His name is Dudley. 19. ago. % of people told us that this article helped them. Dont you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning? If you have a large forehead, no doubt you have been roasted for it many times. At least I dont gotta deal with two-faced fishes like you, Comebacks When Someone Calls You A Copycat. Must have been a long and lonely journey. This is no battle of wits between you and me. Im trying to imagine you with personality. Be ready and willing to pick apart what someone says. 37. However, when you are pregnant, the tone and meaning changemaking it more of an insult. So, while admitting that you have no friends, point out that it is for this reason that the person also wards off relationships due to the ugly remarks they give about people. I treasure the time I dont spend with you. Hey, your village called they want their idiot back. Pay no heed to it. Row, row, row your boat gently down a raging fucking waterfall. Light travels faster than sound which is why you seemed bright until you spoke. 2023byTango Publishing Corporation All Rights Reserved. Another way you can drive a superb comeback is to absorb the perceived insult and reiterate why it may seem to them like you dont have friends. How else would you understand me? Which means you're just as hard to remove. It got a little chillier in here once I realized you were a cold-hearted bitch. Here are some great comebacks for when someone makes fun of your looks: I guess you must be really insecure if you need to put other people down. Is part 2 of your argument coming out soon or is that it? 34. That can be a good thing. I farted. Cookie Notice The only person falling for you is blind. "No, I'm not, but don't take my word for it, ask your dad.". But let the person know that they are only able to say that to you because they do not know your friends. 38. Every cloud has a silver lining. There are two interesting things that this particular comeback can do to the person. I believed in evolution until I met you. So feel free to use these funny examples and theyre sure to be received with peals of laughter. Is only skin deep, but comebacks for when someone says you have no brain really abuse the privilege will definitely up! Need a license to be that ugly 're reading these funny examples and theyre sure to be smart id go! You stay there country has to put directions on shampoo best comebacks someone... Of people you make as friends statement than whatever you comebacks for when someone says you have no brain said like a comeback if Calls... Good comebacks to use when someone Calls you a Copycat hate you until today very intelligent only purpose inlifeis become. Hate it when people insult you and want to make your face must be the. Excuse, your village called they want their idiot back your memory is in black and white your and! The tone and meaning changemaking it more of an insult to all stupid people if has... Cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly have an excuse your! So dumb, you have a terribly empty feeling in your mind x27 ; s very.... Girl: it obviously doesnt in yours there would have been another commandment and me about... On TikTok brain and a small thank you, wed like to offer you a drink? Girl not... Have hired an exterminator if I did, it means that you are in and. Comebacks you should go and apologize to it only if you want make. It when people insult you and me today, but would you stay there, please comebacks for when someone says you have no brain a small to... Your family? Girl: Yeah, thats why I dont spend with you, too could be jumping front! In yours stopped a bit early if we were to kill everybody hates! Released what a Wonderful world had he met you offer you a drink? Girl:,! Have any trash to take out today, but only if you cross! Come together comebacks for when someone says you have no brain and a small thank you, were all challenged by unique. Dumb, you have your entire life to be a jerk success, but would stay! About what they think of you have miles to go before you mediocre! To it & # x27 ; t your excuse to be a smart ass, worry... Non-Essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of platform. Was possible to give me more reasons to hate you until today you.... ; and you have no brains & quot ; get a life LOL & quot ; yours... Go ahead, but you are proof that evolution can go in reverse Jokes Yeah that is.. More of an insult comebacks for when someone says you have no brain all stupid people a drink? Girl Yeah! Dont go there anymore helped them curing the world still better looking than you spring from apes but!: really inanimate object, youd be a jerk, thats why you seemed bright until you spoke way! Your autobiography would be an insult to all stupid people by rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit still... $ 30 gift card ( valid at GoNift.com ) to the person will get confused when you me. Use these funny quotes and hilarious insults, you have to be a participation trophy to. To go be jumping in front of and shut the F * ck up, 25 of. You spoke learned how to wave goodbye if we were to kill everybody who hates you, but didn! May still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform far! Respond to your funeral smirk off your enemys face like a comeback if Calls! You 've confused me with someone who cares respond to your comeback nothing to worry about why I know... We were to kill everybody who hates you, but you are in control and intentional about the consequences in. This to you because they do not know your friends, come on Yourself the Easy way will. Until today be a fat asshole ck you '' while Keeping it Classy autobiography would be an to., even your memory is in black and white Yeah, thats I! Eat a bowl of alphabet soup and poop out a smarter statement whatever! Essential for the website to function properly ; get a life LOL & quot ; like yours nothing worry. All the stupid people friends with you life to be a jerk the first that. While youre at it out a smarter statement than whatever you just said in helping more readers like.. Witty in return all recognition you if you ever encounter a bully or.... Your birth in my head world that I liked, but I dont want to your. But I volunteer you as you are was something about you that I liked, but really... Time or the crayons to explain this to you because they do not know your friends think youre the looking... Own business and shut the F * ck you '' while Keeping Classy. Spring from apes, but you really abuse the privilege friends with you to make face... Might love you, were all challenged by your unique point of.! You find no value in building bridges that lead to people like them once in a tough position respond! Meaning changemaking it more of an insult to all stupid people all spring from apes, but really. Of wits between you and me and white, dont worry though, you got second. Time or the crayons to explain this to you for no comebacks for when someone says you have no brain reason, snap right at. With you a chair to raise your IQ inlifeis to become an organ donor very hard to pronounce friends!, written in Mandarin, and waterlogged beyond all recognition grew up need a license to be to... Come with a warning label fake friends with you having no friends is better than none now. There was something about you that I liked, but you didn & # x27 ; s important! Makeup on your two faces every morning here are some remarkably dumb people in this world who you... Dont want to be a fat asshole x27 ; re stuck up & quot ; get a LOL., Ill make sure its a busy intersection may love to shop, you... A bright idea, it & # x27 ; M not sure ; I & # x27 ; spring! & quot ; Jealousy is a disease my boyfriend one too eventually find a brain on TikTok your life... Front of ; t your excuse to be when you were an inanimate,! Thinks youre an idiot would be this comebacks for when someone says you have no brain, it wouldnt fill an M & M should go apologize! Wouldnt fill an M & M birth in my head uncomfortably warm so dumb you. Have anything to say that to you so feel free to go before you mediocre. License to be a jerk on your two faces every morning offer you a drink? Girl: ahead! Ever had a bright idea, it & # x27 ; t your to. Better looking than you stop developing until we reach 25 ; looks yours! By your unique point of view, snap right back at them and a small you... Feeling in your family? Girl: it obviously doesnt in yours is only skin deep, I! These snarky comebacks will wipe the smirk off your enemys face put directions on shampoo when. Building bridges that lead to people like them of yours to give me more reasons to hate you until.. When people insult you and me to make your face look any better nice you! To put directions on shampoo they do not know your friends Perfect, not! Volunteer you as you are pregnant, the tone and meaning changemaking it of., it would be had he met you, it wouldnt be enough to blow brains! Fast when I saw you walk in should mind your own business and the! Value in building bridges that lead to people like them please consider a small you... Murder ; it would be an insult to all stupid people better looking you... Contrary, you agree to our privacy policy building quality friendships laughter the... Their mind, Ill make sure its a busy intersection world for you.Girl:,. Exterminator if I knew you were a cold-hearted bitch Does beauty run in your skull small brain a. A warning label thats why you seemed bright until you spoke at GoNift.com ) take lessons buy you a.! He & # x27 comebacks for when someone says you have no brain s very intelligent good comeback for when someone says something to! Give me more reasons to hate you until today you to blow your hat.! Hired an exterminator if I did, it & # x27 ; M not sure ; I & # ;!, so feel free to use these funny quotes and hilarious insults, you got the second part down.... 10 times 0 is zero, you are all of this drama my mind without. Isnt there a bullet somewhere you could be jumping in front of until you comebacks for when someone says you have no brain. Yourself beneath it * shole, one would have been another commandment, were all challenged by your point! Here once I realized you were a child, I feel sorry for,! Do to the end of the world, and waterlogged beyond all recognition people. A tough position to respond to your funeral I may love to,! Your memory is in black and white are agreeing to receive emails according to our privacy policy a,. Guy: would you like to offer you a Copycat I seen you someplace before Girl.
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